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Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Christmas trees yet again

The biggest problem with living in an apartment and having a live Christmas tree is, "What do I do with the tree when Christmas is over?" Generally, we de-decorated (undecorated?) it on New Years day, but then we had a big empty pine tree carcass and we didn't know what to do with it. So we put it on the balcony and ignored it.

One year, when it was still on the balcony in February, David jokingly suggested that we throw it off the balcony to the balcony below. "We can't do that," I replied in mock horror. "That little lady who hosts the Bible study group lives downstairs!"

Susan Craft was there, and said, "No problem. Set it on fire first. They'll just think it's the burning bush!"

Ha, ha!

The situation led me to write the following Christmas carol for our homemade Christmas card. The carol is sung to the tune of "O Christmas Tree".

Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
Your branches green delight us.
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
Your branches green delight us.
If only you just wouldn't stay
Out on the balcony 'til May.
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
Your branches green delight us.

Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
In March you are a problem.
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
In March you are a problem.
So David says, "Why don't you throw
It to the balcony below?"
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
In March you are a problem.

Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
By April you're a danger.
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
By April you're a danger.
"Set it ablaze,* says Susan Craft,
"And soon there will be nothing left."
Oh Christmas tree, Oh Christmas tree,
By April you're a danger.

Oh Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
By May we want our balcony.
Oh Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
By May we want our balcony.
So Susan shoves you in a bag
Which to the trash room she then drags,
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
That really was quite easy.


The good news is that we happened to think of actually throwing it away before we resorted to trying one of my more brilliant ideas, which was to cut each branch into tiny pieces and grind it in the garbage disposal. Had we done that, I'd probably still be grinding.
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1 comment:

  1. LloydDecember 18, 2010 at 6:45 PM

    I really miss your Christmas cards. But I have saved several from over the years!

    ReplyDelete

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